Misadventures of a Reluctant Tenth
by Jezha
Summary: The thoughts and misadventures of our adorable protagonist, Tsunayoshi Sawada ! Follow his daily life Via: Diary. Pairings: TsunaXAll, various innuendo'd pairings
1. One day

Disclaimer: All rights do not belong to me. KHR doesn't belong to me. Fon doesn't belong to me. D:

Misadventures of the Reluctant Tenth

* * *

Day: 1 [Monday]  
Entry: 1  
Location: Namimori Middle School Toilet cubicle number 5  
Mood: Frazzled, Annoyed, Scared shitless little Tsuna.  
Listening to: ...I DUNNO.  
Topic: I am so fucking dead, aren't I.

* * *

_Dear Diary,_

_I never thought there would be a time where I would prefer to keep my 'Dame-Tsuna' status as a nobody with a nameless face. The day has finally arrived._

_Dear Kami, please, I beg you, I take back what I said about not being satisfied with my position._

_PLEASE MAKE THEM GO AWAY._

_Apparently, this little kid shows up at my house, tells me that I'm a descendant of the mafia._

_Why am I not surprised?_

_I just gained a subordinate [bitch], who's called Gokudera Hayato. It was psycho shit when he tried to blow me [and half the fucking precious school] up, before Yamamoto came by and thought this was all a game. Then he has this MASSIVE character change, and suddenly, he's my loyal right hand man [manservant] with a dash of dramatica._

_Then..._

_I got caught by the prefect of Namimori, Hibari Kyoya._

_He is ONE SCARY DUDE._

_So Reborn pops up all over the place, defying the law of physics, but he tells me it's an anime, and hits me. I can't even retaliate due to the fact that I'm supposed to be a worthless wimp who can't do jack for his life. I hate this image. If I wanted to, I could charm the pants off the _TEACHERS_ if I wanted to._

_Anyway, I digress. I think it's because Reborn's some alien who really, **really** wants to kill me with all this crazy shit._

_I found out he can mind read- the hard way *wince*_

_Ryohei Sasagawa- Kyoko's brother found me curled up in a corner. All. Hell. Broke. Loose. Especially since I had to train with him, panting, sweating, and half-naked. I swear Gokudera was bleeding, and Chrome was blushing. Add a little 'Kufufufu' with Hibari-san, and..._

_Good God._

_Never, NEVER attempt to pacify Hibari when Mukuro clings to you, and announces that he wants your body- literally. I barely mabaged to escape with two [painful] bruises._

_That'd how I ended up here. _

_This is the safest place in the building right now. Especially since this is a place so small, even Reborn can't get in. _

_

* * *

_

Tsuna looks up from his scribble, and puts an ear to the door of the cubicle. There was no noise.

Good.

Moving silently, He unlocked the door, peeked out, and ran for his life. A blur of flying colour was seen, dashing over to the said Sawada. Mukuro uses sneak!Attack! No.2, and tries to pin Tsuna on the ground.

Tsuna uses Girly!Scream!, which causes fellow family members to rush in, and used Lameattempt!Shoving Lvl.1 to try to get a grinning Mukuro off.

HE FAILS. Mukuro leans in for awesome!kiss, the following happens

Gokudera uses Bad!Language EXTREME and brings out dynamite, while Hibari caresses Tonfas!of!Doom.

Yamamoto laughs, but is slowly unsheathing newly acquired Samurai Sword.

Ryohei uses his EXTREME! pep talk, but is jumping.

Again, Tsuna shrieks, which brings Chrome back, instead of that grinning pineapple.

He swears he can hear a 'Kufufu' resonating, but it was a disappointed one.

Tsuna uses the following: Losing of Manly pride, Dizziness Lvl 5, Spluttering and stammering, blushing, edging away, and then Run for life...

In that order.

* * *

Day: 1  
Entry Number: 2

_Dear Diary,_

_It's still the same day, but many things have happened. I'm currently in the broom closet._

Pause. Shake of head.

_I tried to be 'Dame-Tsuna' again, but now, the bullies are looking for me, due to Yamamoto's confrontation._

_Chyeah. Thanks, Yamamoto-kun. _

_Gokudera didn't help. He shoved Dynamite up their nose and asked them to get away- and even then I'm putting it mildly._

_Hana says I've gained a harem of seme's._

_We've gotta stop reading doujinshi together._

_Imagine the FANFICS about us._

_I thought I saw a few ones with everyone, actually._

_Suddenly, a flash of light appeared, and landed on an unwitting victum. Bum bum Buuuuuumm~_

_..._

_I apologize. _

_Such is the effect of being around Collonello too much. Thank GOD Lal is awesome, and has him all around her little finger._

_Kukasabe-san's hairstyle...I wonder if Hibari designed it..?_

_//Shudder//_

_I'm never letting him near my clothes. Ever. Period._

_Oh, by the way.._

_Why do they all insist I take my shirt off...?_

_**Mukuro** asked out plainly._

_**Hibari** claimed to look for injuries._

_**Gokudera** said it was too hot._

_**Yamamoto** said it was too hot. [Why was he holding my hand?]_

_**Ryohei** told me to join the boxing team._

_Lambo...didn't care, thank god._

_I think even Xanxus mentioned it in passing once..twice...something like that._

_OH. SHIT. It think they've found me. Gokudera-kun's voice is nearby. I wish he'd stop the 'Juudaime' thing. It's not like I'm really gonna be a mafia boss._

_Ahahah._

_..._

_Yeah...I guess I'd better go now, I feel bad for making them worry._

Sighing, Tsuna put the pen in the freshly written in book, and then hopped down. "Gokudera-kun, I'm her`"

He found himself gloptackled by a blur of silver hair.

And he felt something warm on his lips.

CUE INWARD FAINTING AND LOSS OF ALL TSUNA SENSE

"G-goku..dera...kun..?"

"Tenth! I apologize deeply..I-I...!!"

**Sigh.**

"Naah, it's fine. Let's not tell 'Bari and 'Kuro, kay..?"

Silver hair nodded.

Today had been a looong day.

* * *

Day: Still...One.  
Entry number: 3

_Dear Diary,_

_It's been a loooong day._

_Even longer than usual, with me hackings and everything..._

_But let's not worry about me._

_I've decided that being a mafia boss...isn't bad._

_It's horrible._

_And with Reborn around, I don't see how I can ever finish my hacking stuff, and the acid balloons I've been working on._

_Thank Kami no one knows about my stuff._

_I've gained some...friends, I guess._

_Well, I gotta finish homework now. And a sidenote: If you're reading this, guardians, then know this- Smile~ because there's a hidden camera in this book. Jaa~!_

_

* * *

_And so it begins;

The Misadventures of a [Reluctant] Tenth  


* * *

Owari~


	2. In a tree

Disclaimer: KHR IS SOO MINE. THAT'S WHY Mukuro and Hibari have hot sex every episode, or another one confesses to Tsuna. No, it's not mine. D:

Misadventures of the Reluctant Tenth - Chapter 2

* * *

Day: 2 [Tuesday]  
Entry: 1  
Location: Namimori Middle School, in a tree.  
Mood: Daresay...hopeful? Perhaps a little resigned and annoyed. In a meditative calm. For now. [It'll never last]  
Listening to: If today was your last day- By Nickleback  
Topic: My life..?

* * *

_Dear Diary,_

_I've decided to let my...friends..? I guess? -Remain as familiga. Reborn's still stalking me, I _swear_. Apparently, Kyoko and Haru, and Hana seem to have very strange ideas. Just becuase Gokudera practically worships me [God, why am I called Jyuudaime?!], Yamamoto has suddenly become buddy-buddy, Hibari popping up all the time, Chrome and Mukuro always nearby [alledgedly to protect me from Hiba-san], and so on._

_It's a good thing I create traps around my fucking bed._

_This morning, I found several doujinshi fangirls trapped in the laser-triggered net, whilst Gokudera was hanging sheepishly from the ceiling upside down, Chrome snagged to a chair, and Yamamoto under it, laughing._

_And this is a normal, ordinary day in my so called 'Life'_

_What does this tell others about me, I wonder...?_

_Oh, and you'll never believe it, diary. I gained an older brother- Dino Cavallone. Or something._

_He's pretty, like Giotto-san, but I found out he's totally useless without his slave/family/bodyguard around._

_...Ooh, kinky._

_Giotto-san is cool, I wanna be like that when I grow up... :DDD_

_..._

_Anyway, just as an update, no one's bothering me up here. And I need to tell you this: I'm not **that** stupid. _

_Everyone else is like 'Oh, don't worry, Tsuna won't notice', and so on._

_Why the HELL am I surrounded by man-whores who want nothing more than to get into my pants? _

_And I meant that literally._

_I mean, you can see that they're all having relationships all over the place. And get this: Even Mukuro and Hibari are getting it on._

_...Come to think of it, 69 is a very, extremely kinky number to have. And then there's Dino. I'm wondering who gets the top..? [Hibari or him...?]_

_The only person I **kinda** trust now is Basilicum/Basil-kun. Because, for starters, he actually listens to whatever the hell I'm talking about. And. He doesn't try to rape me [mentally or phsyically] every time he sees me. That would be the reason I'm sitting with him up here. And no, he can't see this because he's asleep. He looks really cute when he sleeps -insert XD face here-_

_And yes, I'm sitting in his lap._

_And no, I'm not selfless enough to care that when the others find out we're like this- even for a moment- We'll need like...millions of Euros to fix everything here. I enjoy spending time with him. Basil, that is. I find his name cool. Much, much better than 'Tsuna/Tuna/whatever'_

_Hey, he's waking up. I'mma be right back, diary._

* * *

Basilicum, or Basil, as we will call him, stretched out a little, yawning slightly.

His vision was slightly fuzzy, and he felt warm and cozy in the tree with Sawada-dono. Something tickled his face, and his arms were wrapped around something comfortable. He nuzzled into the warmth, ans sighed in content.

Until the warmth shifted a bit.

Basil's mind was still slowly processing the movement- Wait, movement? Blue eyes widened approximately thrice the size of the usual, as he remembered the 10th vongola boss being up here with him. He was horrified.

'AHH, what have I done??!!'

"S-sawada-dono..!! I apologize to thee! I did not mean to-"

"Chill, Basil-kun." Tsuna let out a calm chuckle, as he shifted over the branch a little more.

"B-but--!!"

Tsuna smiled at the stuttering boy next to him, as he shook his head, indicating that it was no problem. But since Basil's outburst was pretty loud, there were a few who had reached the base of their tree/hiding place. Letting out another bout of silent laughing, Tsuna said quietly "I'll go first, you wait until they leave, alrigh- HII--!!"

"Kufufu~"

"Mukuro..!! What the..?"

Apparently, Tsuna was kinda flying. Or it could always be an illusion.

"Oya, Tsu-kun, remember when I said I'll possess your body..? Well, I meant it literally."

Just as they touched the ground, Tsuna was crowded with everyone shouting out "Are you alright's" and "Juudaime!" and "Haha, Tsuna, your funny" and "EXTREEEMELY AWSOME."

So deciding that he was fucked- Literally- if he didn't get away, he whipped around, and let his eyes widen a fraction.

"Byakuran-kun!"

And when the heads turned, snarling, and met with nothing...

Tsuna took off, with his X-gloves propelling him through the air. His only thought was:

'SHITSHITSHIT Gotta go to a classroom!!!'

* * *

Day: 2  
Entry: 2  
Listening to: Haven't met you yet- Michael Buble  
Location: In school, under the teacher's desk

* * *

_Dear Diary,_

_I've managed to survive another day. Barely. I'm squished under a teacher's desk, and I'm on the run from [several] maniacal familgia who want..well, my virginity. I swear I'm straight as they come._

_...._

_So untrue. I'm actually Bisexual, really, and I have nothing against guys that wanna court me, but this is taking insanity to a whole different level. Ahh...Valentines day was a massive disaster, diary. I would've written in you, only I didn't buy you from our lovely supermarket downtown as I actually had no trace of a life whatsoever two months ago._

_And I'm hungry. _

_So.._

_sigh._

_Reborn decided that'd it be so much more fun to watch as I get wooed, by many admirers, far and wide. I never knew I was that popular. I guess it's because I carry the 'Uke' gene, and then later.._

_Actually, to put things short, he declared that whoever can woo me gets a french kiss..._

_From moi._

_I really wouldn't mind, but after today, I'm seriously starting to doubt my intelligence._

_Not that I apparently have one, as portrayed by the anime. Do you know how incredible STUPID I look? I mean, I love being in my dying will mode- the not crazy one, thank you very much._

_It makes me look sexier~ _

_ALIENS, IF YOU ARE OUT THERE, PLEASE KIDNAP ME. IT'D BE BETTER THAN FACING REBORN'S FURY AND SMIRKS WHEN HE REALISES THAT I AWAYS HAVE TO FAIL TESTS AND GET TORTURED._

_Waking up in a french maid outfit was not pleasant, by any standards. And watching clulessly while everyone mentally undressed me was not very comfortable. Due to the amount of blood shed, I needed a new house. It still looks exactly like the old one... Only, with secret passages I know about. No one else does. _

_So..I guess this might be my last diary entry. Rebor could be kind enough to numb my body for whatever sadistic thing he decides to perform. All I know is, I'm seriously going to lose my virginity, if they keep this up._

_Oh, don't worry. My sanity's already thrown into a 10-year loop._

_Signing off with love, _

_Tsuna (screwedscrewedscrewed) Sawada._

_P.s: FUCK MY LIFE, MANN._

* * *

**O MA KE~!!**

Tsuna froze at the sound of a familiar voice, saying "Herbivore, what the hell." He turned slowly, trying to think up of desperate excuses, as the prefect of Namimori high came closer, closer, [toclose,tooclose, TOOCLOSE!!!] to his face...

And promptly ravaged it in a hungry kiss.

Tsunayoshi Sawada fainted from loss of sanity, and of course, hormones.

* * *

**Owari~**


End file.
